‘I’m not into black girls’ a poem by Dai’Sha Berry

“The first time I heard it, I was barely a teenager,

hardly even aware of the concept of race.

I saw that my skin was sometimes darker
and sometimes lighter than some of my friends’,

but similar to the way that raindrops felt cold

and the way that the sun shined brighter some days,

that was just the way that things were.

my crush was a pale boy with long brown hair,

and his eyes were the same color

as the mud he slashed through on his dirt bike

at three o’clock pm every friday.

I sat on my porch sometimes and watched him

go up and down the hill across the street,

up and down like the teeter totters at recess.

he’d run inside and grab an umbrella when it rained

and we’d share it as we walked to our friends’ houses

just so we could all come back

and jump on my trampoline together.

he moved away the next year,

and I moved on until one night

when I ran into him at the skating rink.

we sat down and talked

over split cheesy fries,

and somehow, I mustered up the courage to tell him

how the sun cowered under the light of his laugh,

and how his eyelashes made butterflies

hate their wings.

poison oozed from his lips as he said it,

and something inside of me broke –

or maybe something awakened.

I started to see my blackness as an obstacle

that would never go away,

like a dark cloud

constantly raining over my head

that everyone else saw

but couldn’t handle,

as if they had to do anything more

than bring an umbrella.

– i’m not into black girls

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